Lost questions song..

Of course the one they are forgetting is how all the men constantly have scruff-face. Clean shaven, fine. Beard, fine. But how the hell do you constantly have five day growth?????

--Paul

TRIANGLE (a review)

TRIANGLE (a review)

A cool little Brittish film starring Melissa George and Liam Hemsworth (whose older brother Chros is going to play Thor!). So cool, in fact, that I'll put part of the review in inviso-text (you have to highlight the area to see the text) so as not to give anything away unless you really want to know. The story starts out normal enough with a group of people setting out on a fun sailing trip. But then they are caught in a strange storm. The boat capsizes and they drift to find a large, seemingly abandoned ocean liner. They climb on board, but now more strange things begin to occur, and then they are attacked and realize they are not alone on the ship.

invisotext:
What Melissa Goerge's character realizes they are caught in a time loop. Why/how is never explained (apparently all movies are doing the Cloverfield/no explaination thing!) but we can guess it has something to do with the storm they were caught in. The thing is that each time the loop repeats, it means another copy of themselves are coming to ship. So there are multiple copies of each character coming to the ship again and again in an endless loop. Eventually she decides the only way to break the loop is to kill the other people to break the cycle. She's willing to do this because she is desperate to get back to her son. Eventually she is able to do this, but the strange things continue and we realize she is still caught in a loop more tragic then we imagined before.

A final warning -- the first time I watched the movie around midpoint I was lost (yes, I was doing other stuff ont he computer as I watched, but still...) so I had to watch it again, and then one more time. The movie does pay itself off very well. These kinds of movies are hard to do and I think this movie did it well. There are still a lot of problems that prevent it from being great. Namely, while the movie does a great job with it's elaborate, twisting plot, there really isn't anything underneath a lot of cool plot. Similar movies (Groundhog's Day, Back in Time) use the plot to say something about the characters. I didn't get that from this movie. The lack of emotion undercuts what otherwise is a very cool movie. Still for fans of puzzle movies (like Primer) it's worth watching.

--Paul

The Book of Eli (a review)

The Book of Eli
(a review and critique)

Did you like TAKEN? Was it fun watching Liam Neeson kick some a**? Well, this movie stars Danzel Washington and the best part is watching him kick a**! Unfortunately, there's not that much of it and the rest of it is a bit of a mess in this post-apocalyptic story that has a man named Eli (aka Denzel) marching west. The real story is about the confrontation betwene Eli and a man named Carnegie (played by Gary Oldman), who is the mayor of a small town that Eli passes through to recharge him iPod and trade some valuables (like gloves) for fresh water. You see, Denzel has something valuable, something important, something that Oldman has been searching for. At first Carnegie will try to get Eli to join him, and when that doesn't work he will go after Eli to get what he has.

Now, there should be a lot of questions, like what is Eli carrying? And what happened to make the world this post-apocalyptic mess? Well, what Eli is carrying is a Bible. It's never quite made clear what happened to the world, but when it did religion was blamed and every bible was destroyed. Eli has the last remaining one and he has had visions that he needs to take it west. The mayor wants it because it can inspire people so he can turn his small town into a big town. There are a few action scenes that are filmed with style by the Hughes Brothers (i.e. the morons who ruined Alan Moore's From Hell), but there just isn't anything else to it. I suppose it's supposed to be a modenr take on a western where a guy drifts through a town, blah, blah, blah, but that doesn't excuse the lack of ANYTHING else being there. Overall, the movie can be kind of cool and the action scenes are kind of fun, but the rest you can just fast forward through.

I don't know...I had planned on posting all the things that didn't make sense in the movie but there are so many of them that it was taking too long. Maybe I'll come back and do it, but probably not.

Couples Retreat (a review)

This'll be a quickie. This is exactly what you'd expect from a Vince Vaughn comedy. He plays a kind-of schlub who does the whole when-I-get-upset-I-start-talking-fast-and-even-though-I-should-be-angry-it-comes-out-as-being-funny-because-of-all-the-weird-and-innappropriate-things-I-say routine that he is famous for. The story is about four couples who go to a marriage counceling retreat at a tropical island together. Now, only one couple wants to be there -- the others go along as part of a package deal thinking they can skip the councelling stuff and have some fun on the beach. As the couples are forced through various odd councelling routines it puts stress on their relationships and friendships. But not too much stress. This is a comedy and most of the scenes are played more for laughs. So is it funny? Well, it's okay. I like Vaughn and while his schtick can get old (is that how you spell schtick? It's feels like it should have more consonants), when it's working he's about as funny as any other comedian around. The problem is the film is just...nice. There are some funny moments, but they never build off each other so they don't build up to any really big laugh scenes -- it's just a moment here, a moment there. I can see why a lot of people wouldn't like it -- it feels a bit by the numbers, there's no real go-for-it attitude with the humor, no point of view. That's because while the concept of movie is about couples an their problems the filmmakers clearly don't really care about any of that -- it's just there for concept and to get a couple laughs. That's okay for the first half, where they play out the comedy of these couples trapped into counseling, but by the second half where the couples' problem come more to the fore, there just isn't anything there. This isn't a movie that has anything to say about relationships or marriage or people in general, so that second half has a lot of running around (there's a party island next door that several people run off to), but it really just feels like empty running around. So think of it as Wedding Crashers-lite -- lite on funny, lite on insight, a version to watch while you play games with friends and friends. Which isn't bad. But isn't that funny either.

--Paul

AWAKE (a review)

AWAKE
(a review)

This is the kind of movie writers love and audiences hate. Why? It's that cool concept self-contained thriller that writers can generate heat with, but almost never live up to the hype...and with self-contained thrillers if the thriller part isn't really cool then there isn't going to be anything else -- no big action scenes, no great comedy bit, nada. And because the love interest is Jessica Alba there's no nudity. Instead there's just a lot of build up that doesn't have much suspense and a lame resolution with no emotion.


The concept is that this super rich guy (Hayden Christiansen) is getting a heart transplant but for some reason instead of going to sleep he stays completely conscious. Then he realizes someone is trying to kill him while he is on the operating table. Luckily, he not only is conscious (so he can feel pain) but can walk around like a ghost/astral projection as he tries to unravel the mystery of who is killing and save himself.

Not a bad concept. Actually, pretty damn cool. Good enough that I'm jealous I didn't think of it. Unfortunately, the actually movie is bad enough that I'm not that jealous (except for the fact that he got a movie made with name actors and I'm sitting on my broke a** in my crappy studio apartment).

Let me hit some problems. (This will be SPOILER heavy, but seriously the movie is lame enough you won't really care if you know.) First, there's the mystery of who's killing him. Except it isn't really a mystery. We find out pretty fast who is in on it. There's only one question -- his wife (Alba) -- will she find out what is happening or is she in on it? Unfortunately even that is told to us pretty quickly. So the only real mystery is will he save himself and the answer, unfortunately, is no. That's right -- no. That's the problem of him being astral projection guy -- he can walk around and listen (and for some reason flash back to his past a lot) but he can't actually do anything.

(the movie Jessica Alba should make)

So we have a thriller where the protagonist doesn't really do anything, where there isn't much mystery and none of that other fun stuff -- action scenes, supernatural scares, comedy, nudity, etc, etc. And it gets worse -- there is this subplot where the protagonist is worried about living up to the man his father was. Turns out he killed his father, who was yelling at his mom...and that's supposed to be the big emotional 3rd act moment. Like killing your father is a good thing. Way to go son. (Or maybe not...I wasn't paying that close attention by the end.)

Which isn't to say there isn't anything interesting in the movie. Just the moment where Christiansen is on the table aware and able to feel pain and they begin to cut into him is pretty cool. And for such a contained concept they actually come close to pulling it off. The emotional element of Christiansen living up to his father was pretty empty and they give away the mystery too soon, but if they hadn't they might have gotten a pretty fun little thriller out of it.

--Paul

Star Trek meets...

Too funny! Brilliant!

Star Trek meet Monty Python --




Star Trek meets The Love Boat --



--Paul

The Bank Job
(a review)

Let me start by saying heist movies suck. We know almost everything before the movie has started and most promise thrills that end up being disappointments. Yes, Ocean's Eleven was fun, but aside from that I can't think of almost any that I've liked. Until now.

The story, starring Jason Statham, is a fun twist on the heist film. You see this bad guy who has incriminating pictures of several high up British people (parliment, princess, etc). Now the government wants to put this guy in jail, but they can't because he will leak the pictures, so instead they convince a woman to get a team together to rob the bank. The team can keep the money, but they want the pictures. Of course, after the robbery things start to unravel and once the police are after the bank robbers, the government types now have to get to the robbers before the cops. Told in more of a low key style than most of Statham's movies (Transporter, Crank, War), this is easily the best.

I didn't have expectations when I started the film, but I'd definitely recommnd it!

--Paul

Girl's Best Friend
(a review)

A comedy starring Jeanne Garofalo where Garofalo is funny and cynical and complains about how she was hurt in the past and pushes people away, but eventually learns to open herself with a happy ending. Which describes most of the bad elements of the film (i.e. lots of cliche, lots of cynical, no real big laughs), but there's a lot of good too. And, to be honest, part of my disappointment is probably because from the title I assumed the "friend" was a vibrator, which would have been a much funnier movie, but they chose to go in a different direction. The story revolves around Mary (Janeane Garofalo). She's a rock music critic who thrashes every band she hears. So bad are her thrashings that the newspaper she works for forces her to take a vacation. She is also struggling with her boyfriend who wants to move in with her, but she was hurt in the past (divorce) and wants things to stay right where they are -- i.e. safe. She also won't listen to his band for fear that she will hate it and it will end their relationship (but it is a country band so that's understandable). Then she gets a call from her sister. Her mother has broken her leg and Mary is forced to fly out to Kansas and then drive back east with her mother's dog. Along the way she will lose the dog, meet a cute young musician, breka up with her boyfriend, go to her ex-husband's wedding, and to her nephew's birthday party. By then she has realized that she loves her boyfriend and tries to make it to his first performance in New York.



What works in the movie is Garofalo, and if you're a fan of hers then the movie is enjoyable. While there aren't any big laughs there are a lot of enjoyable moments (the ex-husband's wedding is probably the best) and she brings a nice realism to the role that helps some of the quiet, emotional moments hit home. And in case it wasn't clear, the actual "friend" of the title is a dog.

I don't think the movie is available for rent in the US yet, but you might be able to view it through the Lifetime network website -- http://www.mylifetime.com/movies/girls-best-friend

--Paul

First post

So welcome. First and foremost this will be a place for me to post movie/tv reviews. I'm an aspiring writer, so a lot of the comments will be with a writer's eye. But this won't be just a writing/movies/tv blog -- I'll add whatever cool stuff I find to it. Just big catchall of what I see, hear and think. --Paul